Joey and Me!

Joey is safely contained in a box. This way he doesn't try to lick me!

My upright brought home a puppy and I am not happy, not happy at all.  He takes away her attention, he barks at me in the house which is a no no, and he peed inside the house the other night!  I was mortified that one of my breed would pee inside!  We’re supposed to be the smartest breeds of dogs, but I think he’s a bit slow.  I hatched a plan to get rid of him, but my upright figured it out and told me I was stuck with him. 
So, I’ve made the best of the situation.  When Joey, the puppy, receives a treat for peeing outside, I make sure I get one too.  And unlike him, I can pee several times on a walk!  When Joey receives a treat just for sitting, I’m right there waiting for my treat and I make sure my upright gives me one.  She tells me that she’s training Joey, but in reality, I’m training her.  I am so smart and beautiful, and I am top dog. 
If Joey and I are outside and my upright calls him to come, I make sure he does.  I growl and then herd him over to her.  HA, ha!!!  She thinks she’s training him, but I am.  If he doesn’t come, I make him.  If he doesn’t sit when she asks, I give him a little smack with my paw.  I plan on turning him into my minion who will do my bidding.  Eventually, I’ll train him to give me all his treats. My upright can keep Joey, the puppy, as long as he gives me his treats and toys! 
I’ll even take car rides with him.  I’ll even pretend to like him, because in the long run, my devious plan will work.  I’ll make him adore me, look up to me, and do everything I demand.  Having a puppy isn’t so bad when he becomes your minion.  With Joey at my side, I’ll be able to rule the world and control humans.  Every human will feel compelled to provide me with treats and love!!!  Don’t you want to give me a treat?  I like Old Mother Hubbard treats and Zuke’s natural treats!!!  :)

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I'm pretending to like him by allowing him on my upright's bed.